I've always been called a hopeless romantic. Normally I smile and nod. I'm a little more optimistic when it comes to love than most single guys my age would be, so I am used to the characterization.
But what does it mean to be a hopeless romantic? Does it mean that you believe that your soul mate will magically appear one day and your life will be sunshine and rainbows until the end of your days? Does it mean you believe in fairy tales and happily ever after?
No.
I don't expect some perfect love to fall out of the sky. I know that when it does happen it will be hard. It will take a hell of a lot of work. It will be rough. We'll fight. We'll say things that will end up hurting each other. We'll wonder how the hell we're going to get through it. We'll think "is this the right thing? Should I even try?"
But I also know that if it is the right thing and we do try, it will all be worth it in the end. It won't be perfect, but nobody and nothing is. I just know that somehow, in some way, it will all work out to be the best that I can make it. . . and that's all anyone can ask for.
So call me a hopeless romantic all you want. If being a hopeless romantic means that I believe that love, actual love, not lust, not the romantic perfection of movies and myths, but real love can pull people through anything. If it means that I don't want to just marry the first girl who shows interest in me. If it means that I am alone for a while until I truly find the right person. If it means all those things, then yes. Yes, I am a hopeless romantic and I gladly accept the title.
"Hopeless" seems an odd adjective for a such a positive outlook. I think just "romantic" is enough. It comes through in the way you write.
ReplyDeleteSo for the romantic in you, a bit of motherly advice, "most people find love when they aren't looking for it."
I'm hopeless in the sense that no amount of trying to be different is going to change my romanticism. It is who I am.
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks for the advice, it is in fact the same advice my own mother gave me. That's the reason I've quit going searching for love and trying to draw it out of people who long ago told me that they can't love me the way I wanted them to. I'm just enjoying my life as it comes. I'm alone, and sometimes that hurts, but it is where I am right now, and I accept that.